I Am A Big Failure And So Proud Of It



We have it all so wrong, we believe if we do something and don’t achieve it then we are a failure, we think if we fail we have failed forever. Nothing is so further from the truth.


In fact, it is good to fail, we should do it more often. Failure is just a process, a journey, it is the right of passage, we need to fail to succeed. We not always get the thing right the first time around, when we start walking it takes a while to learn that new skill of standing up and placing one foot in front and then the next.


We don’t just start talking and reading either, it is a skill we need to develop and learn, it takes time and many attempts. We didn’t just start eating on the day we were born, sleeping through the night and even listen to our parents when they shushed us quite, these are all things that we had to learn and develop.


We didn’t hand back our babies to the midwives and say they are a failure because they are not talking, eating, walking or even sleeping property on their first day of living, did we? No of course not, so why do we feel that if we don’t achieve something at first we are a loser?


We have been conditioned wrongly about the word failure, so what does failure really mean;

One dictionary meaning is The neglect or omission of required action. That means it is not the end of it, it just means if we need to add that required action then the outcome would or could be different.


Another dictionary meaning is: Something not completed, someone or something not succeeding, unable to finish. That also means it is not the end of it, it just means that you need to follow throw to finish and complete the task. Another dictionary meaning is lack of success. This also means it is not the end too, it also means it’s just not complete yet, needs more work to succeed.


Each meaning of the word failure doesn’t mean complete or finished or there’s no way back, it just means it is still a working progress and just needs completing. Nowhere did it say it means; LOST, like losing the race. You haven’t lost you are just still on your way.


To really succeed in what you are doing you must first embrace failure as the process of success, we must befriend and love failure, as these are the steps we must take. Failure is the route, the path, the way we need to travel to attain true success.


No one has ever succeeded without failing first, NO ONE! The more successful you are the bigger the failure you are. Sadly, we are conditioned from birth that failure as a negative state, it’s a defeated attitude, a bad experience, losing or held back mentality.


But it is the way we see failure is the key to success. Failure is, in fact, a positive experience, state, and mind-set, we should embrace this experience and celebrate it every time we experience it.


Failure is the opportunity for us to learn, to experience, to travel through our experiences to the destinations that we would never experience otherwise. It makes us wiser, stronger, more knowledgeable, more experienced, more creative, it empowers us to be more flexible, it gives us more freedom and experience to try new things. It accelerates our success,


Failure is our best friend, our soul mate, our friendship should bond us together and forever, we must learn to love failure, we must learn to listen to our best friend and we will learn so much.


By listening, we learn what not to do and what to do differently the next time, we will learn what we need to change, what we need to fix, as long as we listen and take the time to apply the clear lessons we have learned from our failures we will head in the right direction every time.


So many people shun away from failure, they think if they move far away from it and go the opposite direction then they will move towards success. Failure is the path to success, we need to go right through the hart of failure, in-fact the hart of failure is success or success is the heart of failure. We need failure to succeed. But before we can learn from our failures we must first learn to fail and be good at it.


The Fear Of Failure


We fear failure as a plague, a contagious disease, with our emotions and the way we feel when we see ourselves, we hate to be seen as a failure, weak, clueless, an outsider, different, strange, looser, incompetent, someone who cannot accomplish anything or cannot do things right.


We expect put too much of ourselves, we believe no one will except us if we fail, we are well conditioned to move away from failure as a negative experience, thinking it is some kind of contagious disease to say well away from.


We are taught to the success we must stay away from people who are failures, which has some truth to it, but not what you might expect. You can still achieve true success even surrounded by unsuccessful people, those who you should be staying away from are the negative people, not unsuccessful ones. As unsuccessful doesn’t mean they won’t be successful, they are still on their journey to success like you.


You need to stay well away from negative people who try to put you and others down, be warned, you can still have successful people who are also negative.


We are so raped up in believing that everyone is looking and thinking about us, what we do and say. In fact, NO ONE really cares, the truth is that no one is thinking about you, as they are constantly thinking about themselves. Everyone is thinking about themselves 24/7, we don’t really have enough time to think of others.


So we believe that if we take the wrong turn, make a mistake, or look like we failed, people will be watching us and laughing at us. So we aim safe, we don’t try new things or leave our comfort zone, as we might look silly and get egg on our face for trying. We are our worst enemy, we fail to even try, we believe if we don’t have a target to aim for then we won’t miss, we don’t want to look like a loser or failure so we don’t try.


We fear failure as a plague, a contagious disease, when in fact it is the cure, the medicine for success.


Without failure, there is no success. We need to re-condition our minds to embrace failure and not to fear it. Many books over the years have suggested that we embrace fear and use it to our advantage, but fear is a warning mechanism in our subconscious mind to warn us from bad things, we shouldn’t try confusing ourselves and re-condition our subconscious warning signals, as they are there for a dam good reason, we must treat fear with respect and the way we are supposed to look at fear as a warning.

But as to failure, we shouldn’t fear it, but to welcome it with open arms, and



Failing Is The First Step Towards Success


When we fail to accomplish something, we haven’t failed as in lost or defeated, we are merely still in the process of accomplishing it. We just need to amend, fix or redirect our steps to the heart of the failure to achieve total success. We need to re-look at our plan, map, strategy even our techniques and adjust them by listening to our trusting friend failure.


We need to re-condition our minds, we need to look at the concept of failure differently to the way we were taught about it from our childhood. This is not easy to do, in fact, it is very hard to re-condition our minds to something that is hard-wired from an early age, this is the biggest challenge. But if you make it a game it makes it easy to play, then the more you play it starts to become a habit, and when it is a habit, it becomes real and apart of us.


Every time you feel you have failed at something you are in fact one step closer to success, so try giving yourself one point each time you fail, and try to collect as many points as you can before you hit your target, some will be easier than others, so it makes seance to start on small targets, then work your way up to bigger and more harder targets, but always keep collecting those points and keep adding them up.


Reward yourself each time you hit a certain level of points even though you haven’t achieved your goal. It won’t be long before you find it fun and enjoyable failing and you will start achieving success very quickly.


So now go out and fail big, and keep failing over and over again, but remember it only works if you listen and learn from it, take heed from your experiences and apply its wisdom, that’s what makes





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